When I listed the "Worst of the Worst" dictators -- or coconut heads, as I like to call them -- in Foreign Policy last summer, bemoaning their "ignoble qualities of perfidy, cultural betrayal, and economic devastation," few people thought the tyrants would fall any time soon. Then on Jan. 14, 2011, came a loud "THUD!" in Tunisia. A coconut dropped and smashed! Then another in Egypt on Feb. 11! Then on Aug. 24, rebels in Libya seized the "Brother Leader's" compound, forcing the rat to flee into his underground tunnels and disappear. Pro-democracy activists are now vigorously shaking coconut trees in Africa and the Middle East, hoping that their leaders' rickety autocracies will also come crashing down.
COMMENTS (19)
More...
The so-called experts in the Western media were caught napping. These people are not ready for democracy, they once told us. Fox News couldn't even find Egypt on the map, and seemed befuddled by the "senile and paranoid autocrat," as I called Hosni Mubarak last year.
More pathetic and clueless than anyone else, however, were -- and still are -- the hardened coconuts themselves. They never saw it coming and never knew what hit them. With cobwebs dangling from their ears, they remain stone deaf and impervious to reason. With an abiding faith in their security forces to protect and save them, they have spent inordinate amounts of time and money erecting layer upon layer of security between themselves and their people -- just in case one fails.
Under increasing pressure to reform their abominable political systems, dictators across Africa and the Middle East are resorting to some bizarre antics. One after another, they perform the same "coconut boogie":
One swing forward with promises of reform, such as promising not to stand for reelection or investing in jobs programs;
Three swings back, unleashing the full fury of security forces to brutally clamp down on street demonstrators, arresting hundreds of activists and deploying live ammunition, tanks, and jet fighters;
A jerk to the left, with fists pounding on a table and a jab in the air with clenched fist, vowing to hunt down "rats and traitors";
Then finally, a tumble for a hard landing on a frozen Swiss bank account.Zine el-Abidine Ben Ali, Hosni Mubarak, and Muammar al-Qaddafi have all now done the coconut boogie. Now, it is Syria's Bashar al-Assad's turn, though he's still clinging to power. More than 2,200 civilians have been killed so far in the 6-month uprising in Syria, according to the United Nations. But the tree is shaking.
Indeed, it is tough to be a coconut these days. The world is closing in on them. Their citizens are rising up. In the international community, dictators are finding their circle of friends rapidly dwindling, even in the places they used to feel most comfortable. The United Nations, generally petrified of taking on the coconut-heads, adopted a resolution permitting the international no-fly zone against Qaddafi's forces. Switzerland has frozen the bank accounts of one despot after another. Coconuts are no longer welcome, now shunned like the bubonic plague.
And in this climate, paranoia, suspicion, and fear now grip many dictators, leading them to overact hysterically to the least provocation or expression of public dissent. Here are a few examples of the latest antics of some nervous coconuts from our Worst of the Worst list:
SUBJECTS:
(19)
HIDE COMMENTS LOGIN OR REGISTER REPORT ABUSE